The dichotomy facing the average Melvins fan is this: hating their new music because it doesn't resemble that of their heyday, while respecting Buzz Osborne and Dale Crover because they keep doing whatever the fuck they want. Their 27th studio album, ‘Pinkus Abortion Technician’, weighs heavily on this divide. It doesn't sound like classic Melvins because it’s a Butthole Surfers parody album with a Beatles cover in the middle. That’s something nobody asked for, and therefore precisely what the band intended.
Named after the Butthole Surfers’ 1987 album ‘Locust Abortion Technician’, it is, more than anything, a showcase for the absurd songwriting of that band’s bassist, Jeff Pinkus, who is now something of a Melvins mainstay. Osborne and Crover contributed to writing only two tracks, and neither collaboratively. That is why it’s hard to love, or even recognise, ‘Pinkus Abortion Technician’ as a Melvins record.
But taken as an ode to Butthole Surfers, it’s fittingly obscure. It’s all for shits and giggles, and if you revel in the offbeat and random then you might find something here. But on the whole, it would be hard to call any track on ‘Pinkus Abortion Technician’ a keeper.
The opener is a cover of ‘Surfers track Moving To Florida melded with the feel good ‘60s anthem Stop, by James Gang. It’s not something many would have envisioned going together, or wanted to go together for that matter.
The best track here is a bass-heavy, slow blues thump called Don’t Forget To Breathe. This Pinkus original has a cool, sexy groove and an atrociously pathetic music video. But for an album that boasts two bassists on every track (Pinkus and regular Melvins bottom-ender Steve McDonald) it’s pretty singular. Without being told that the two are playing in tandem, it would be hard to tell. When Melvins take this “two pronged bass attack” on the road it’s sure to sound phenomenal, but judging by their recent setlists they largely stay away from playing any of this new album, which is telling.
Their cover of I Wanna Hold Your Hand, as you’d expect, ends up as a bad trip, while the closing track, Graveyard, another Butthole Surfers song, ends the album as it started: disorienting, weird-for-weird’s sake and completely unmemorable. This is the sound of Melvins doing whatever they fuck they want. You can definitely respect that, but you don’t have to like it. If you’re a hardcore Melvins fan ‘Pinkus Abortion Technician’ will frustrate you. And if you’re a diehard Butthole Surfers fan, it’s not the new album you’ve waited 17 years for. It’s a really, really hard sell.
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